Trust Me, This One Is Random Too ( ^w^ )

Hehehehehehehe :)
Well, just want to tell that another amazing coincidence had happen between me and Logan today~ huahahahahaha :D But seriously, this one make me thinking very hard, ya know. It just felt so Magical~ haahahaha.
The story is like this... Last night, I was dreaming about me and Logan and sis Moon and Sis Jaba and so do few others members of my family along with two random kids that I never seen before in my life (Yea, dream bah ) I don't really remember the whole part of the dream lah, its blurry right now. hahaha :D But for sure I really do remember that one time, got one of the people that randomly popped into my dream turn into a zombie by the help of a witch-like women. The zombie was actually looking for Logan. but still, the zombie wasn't really in the same house as we are. hahahaha I don't know, it just... random~ hahaha :D

And then, got this one part I remembered where Logan came out from the bathroom and he was like mumbling "Pgie" but then, out loud, he called me as "Sandara" I was like dafuq? hahahahaha :D I told ya, it was.... random... too freaking random. hahahaha :D and one part I remembered that I was feeding one of the kid I barely knew. hahahahahaha :D what a dream =.= Well, I was woken up before the zombie make it to part two. ahahaha :D

And then kan, as I was dreaming about Logan bah kan.. so as I woke up, I thought of ya know, checking on his twitter account ( ekekeke ) and TAADAA~!! He updated his twitter yesterday and ya know what make me go crazy the most?! HE WAS POSTING SOMETHING ABOUT ZOMBIE TOOO!!! I WAS LIKE OMG!!!!!! XDDDDDDDDD
crazy eh? Gosh, I'm freaking speechless ya know. hahahaha I feel like we're really are spiritually bonding with each other. HAHAHAHAHA adoiii. Kill me please, Lermaniacs!

But seriously, this is the biggest coincidence we had so far. hahaha :D
and  back to reality, he don't even know who the hell I am. hahahaha XD Sad but true~ but coincidence things like this could happen to someone else too, at some other part of earth. ehehei :)
Still, yeah... this totally make my day. heeeee~ still can laughing like crazy right now. hahahahaha
seriously, this is so freaking awesome.
Thank you, God for giving me this kind of awesome coincidence. ekekeke :)
Definitely. I feel loved. hahahaha :)

But seriously, I think my Father in heaven just wanted to see happy. As ya know, I'm quite feeling down lately and yeah, I lied to everybody by telling that I'm cool~ hehei... as usual :) I wish to be gone for a day, without anyone knowing where I go, and when will I come back... just to see who would sacrifice everything just to find me and get me back alive. Because this few days, I keep feeling that everyone is pretending to care about me... I mean like, come on. It's rather obvious ya know. hahaha :D
And well, I don't know lah. Maybe it just me.

and one more thing that make me kinda upset this few days is about what my dad had told me last few days. He was like, telling me to keep on studying business.. like telling me to continue on getting my degree then Master~ In fact, before this. He had promised me that after I finished my diploma study, he and mum would definitely allowed me to further my study by taking the courses I've desired. And when he told me this, I was like "Dafuq, dad?"
I just feel so freaking crashing to pieces. I know now, that they actually always against my dream since forever.Well, fucking obviously. But one for sure, if they hate it, then just freaking tell me. Don't make me hoping for something that for sure won't be true. If they think that buying me newest gadget can make me happy, they are fucking wrong.

I mean like, what the hell? Its a promised though. I keep my promised. I studied what they wanted me too. I take the stupid course that I never want too. I wasted my 2 years times to graduate and I study hard for it. It's all because of their empty promises. If I knew that it just some fucking empty promise, I would say fucking no to it. It not fair at all. Why is it so hard for them to understand how much I want to be graphic designer?

I don't know anymore. I just don't feel like, ya know.... studying. I hate it! I never like it anyway. Whatever. I don't freaking care if I fail or whatever now. It not like I'm going to study what I want anyway. It just fucking unfair. this is one of the reason, I hate to be home.

Uh, i'm leaking. hahahahaha :D Oh well, better talk about something else now. hehehei :) Um.... I don't know what to talk about anymore. hahahaha My hands is shaking ( yeah... Hell, I'm mad right now) Oh yeah, I change my blog song already. Everything Panic at the disco. huahuahua~ I just can't take my ears off Brandon Urie's heavenly voice. ekekeke :D His voice just hard to resist anyway. ekekeke :) But still, I miss the old version of Panic at the disco where there were still 4 of them together :(
Oh wells, everything change. hahahaha :)

Except for Logan's cuteness. hahahahahahahahahhaha kill me nao~ hahahahaha
oh gosh, I think he would probably list me in his 'stalker of the year' list. huahuahua~
and and maybe also in his "will-never-be-my-wife" list. hahahahahaha
Yeah, damn its true~
As he said that he don't like girls who is overly attached to him, A.K.A obsessed with him or stalking him. hahahahaha. Well *pouts* honestly, I'm not really obsess with him or stalking him. I just ya know, looking at his twitter account whenever he suddenly popped into my head. hahaha :D seriously... =.=; 
But I love exaggerating stuff, and which make I looked like I'm too freaking obsessed with him. hahaha but no, I wouldn't call it as obsessed. I called it as LOVE. walawehh~ hahahaha
Yep, I admit. I'm in love with him. hahahahahahahahahahaha XD 
that's why told Lermaniac to kill me right now. hahahaha
I don't want to be in love with him. I don't want to! like freaking seriously. But yeah, feelings. You can't control it once it fell to someone. haishh! my brain keep telling me to wake up and realize the gaps that we have in between us but my heart say YES~ hahahaha crazy, huh? you tell me...
But yeah,
Ya know.
for sure
I'll just keep love him ( even though he has no freaking idea of who i am)
Until he find the right girl to be with.
Well, that girl would definitely the luckiest ever :)
Haish... so sad eh? hahahaha
But this is me.
always be the one who wishes my crushes good luck
and hoping them to be with someone they love
for their happiness means mine too :)
I'll be happy if they are happy too :)

SOOO~ YEAH. Enough about the romantic-what-so-ever things. ekekeke :D later Logan will like "EWWW, this ugly girl strike again~ Please someone kill her!" hahahahahahahahaha
Neways :)
I really do thanking my Lord for the very epic coincidence. hahahaha
like seriously.
even if I die today, I wouldn't care . hahaha
So, yeah. Byebye :)
Be happy always! (^m^)

this picture, cracked me up just now. ^ hahahahahahahaha XD
P.S Let Your Smile Cover Up Your Tears :)

Second MASSIVE Coincidence! XD OMG OMG OMG!

Hi~ I'm back again. ZOMG!!!!!!!!! XDD
guess what?!
Logan Lerman update his tweet last night!!!
I was like ZOMGGGG!!!! XDD
Like, seriously? What a coincidence? I'm just like, ya know, thought about him last night and tadaa~ he's online. OH MY GOD! hahahahaha :DDD 
What a perfect timing eh? hahahahahaha XD

Is it possible that he would looking at this blog of mine and read about it? 
Or we just somehow spiritually connected? HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Pardon my excessive thickness of face (shameless attitude) I'M just SO FREAKING OUT and yet, EXCITED! HAHAHAHAHAHA
call me crazy yo~
I am crazy.~ hahahaha
this is the second coincidence I had with him. hahahaha :D 
It's like, he's updating his twitter, every time I over think about him, like making some impossible scenario in my head... hahahahaha
what a pathetic. hahahaha I know right?  =.=;
Oh well, that is all I can do ma~ IMAGINATION. hahaha :))))

But honestly, this perfect coincidence definitely make my day. hahahaha :D
Thank you, my Lord for giving me this kind of exciting coincidence. ekeke :)
WOW~ Now I'm so going to collect money and fly to LA to meet him. huahahahahhaha
even for a couple of selca would do~ 
and definitely, if I'm happen to have the impossible opportunity in the future,  I'm sooooo going to print it out in the largest photo size ever. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Omona~ I dunno if I can sleep tonight. HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
Aduii~ slap me now~ hahahahahaXDD

ANYHOW, Thank you Logan... for making my day :)
Now you give me reason why I should stay alive and moving on. hahahahahaha :D
Thank you :D

Can't stop smiling now~ hahahahaha :DD
P.S Let Your Smile Cover Up Your Tears :)
P.S Don't freak out, Logan... I may sound like i'm obsess with you, but honestly.. I just can't take my eyes off your cuteness~ hahahaha (=^.^=) 
 Stay Cute , darl ~ XD

I'm Just Be Usually Random Me (-^u^-)

Hey hey Hey~ Long time no see!
Yeah, I kinda miss my Mr.Bloggy =.= but ya know, how my lazybones is~ ekekeke :D neways, I've been updating my Facebook cover and taa-daa~ Nice eh? I KNOW! I love it! ekekeke (=^.^=) Um... I've got not much to share but I don't my blog feel abandoned ma. So, yeah. Just be ready of my awesome randomness~ ekekeke :D

And Oh, I'm currently single for a while as Logan Lerman is busy with Percy Jackson, Perks of Being Wallflowers and maybe also busy with his education hahahahahahahaha :3 Just kidding, I'm currently adoring Josh Hutcherson. Huahahaha XD and and also Niall Horan... and and Yuri Pleskun... and and and... Omoo~ No more. hahahaha :D just those three. Yep, bad news Logan. You have to share. HUAHAHAHAHAHAHA i'm a freak, (tell me something I don't know =.=)
Anyhow, I'm still not hearing any news about Logan Lerman dating anyone so yeah (=^.^=)
I'm happy liao~ hahahaha :D I was randomly (NOT!) googling for Logan Lerman and girlfriend 2012 and Yep, he's single. hahaha :) Thank God, Emma Watson already have boyfriend. If not, I think I'm so worried. hahaha :) well, yeah... She's cute no? and they both leading role in Perks of being wallflowers.. so, yeah :) I'm so glad. hahahaha :)

not that I'm against them if they would ya know 'date', but if can, not Emma Watson. hahaha :) Besides, she's older right? (Not saying I'm the most suitable la) but IF CAN, I would like to see Logan Lerman to date someone younger than him though :) It's just cute~ (^m^) but not too young la~ if the girl is too freaking young, it would make him look like a pedobear. hahahahaha ya know what I'm saying? hahahahaha XD
So, yeah :)

Umm.... Of course, I'm still waiting for Logan Lerman. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA whoa (percentage of being Logan's future wife decreased to 65%) ekekeke :D and I made a list of #Before I Die list. hahaha :D so, yeah... obviously one of it was 'To Meet Logan Lerman'. But if I'm gonna die tomorrow, then, okay. hahahaha I have no choice anyway =.=; but if can lah, I wanna meet him personally. hahahaha and and and take picture. I'm so going to tell my family to bury the picture with me. hahahaha :D
I'm talking like I'm going to die soon =.=; hahahaha
No worries, I'm too cute to die anyway. hahahaha and I'm not a person who die early. Well, ya know. I'm a badass. hahahaha usually badass don't die quickly. =.=;

And yeah~~~ I wanna show off my Mid-term mark here. Wubwubwubwub~ hahahahaha :DDD
I can't believe it myself when I receive back my paper last time. Especially my ITB paper. I was really like, O.O dafuq is this shit? hahahahahahaha :DDD especially question 1 and question 3. I was so blur that time. I just write whatever coming into my mind. And yeah, I don't even study well that time. I was like, sleep all day and then woke up like at 3, read through and then go back to sleep. hahahaha :D

I was like "I'm so fucked up," when I read thru the question paper. But Thank God. Seriously, thank God. hahahahaha :D Miracle do happen. hahahaha :) for ITB, I got the highest mark of all~ WUBWUBWUB! ekekeke :D

For my Computer and e-business, I got 17.9 /20 Well, I must admit... I wasn't really study this one as well. In fact, I was twittering with sis Jaba on the night before. hahahahaha :D seriously. But yeah.... I'm sooo freaking happy to get that kind of mark. And for my ACP, I surely can score better than that if not because of my seatmate who asked to much of question. I just sometimes find that she was freaking annoying and seriously, it was A TEST! EXAMINATION~ gosh, she asked me how to do the fucking thing? I was really pissed that time and.... Oh well, that one passed already. hahahaha :D Thank God I'm not failed my ACP. hehehe :) Oh well, 16.9/20 is not that bad. ehehei :) be grateful~~

and for my Moral. Aha~ this one is really good mark tho. 25/30. I just got 5 wrong. WHOA~ Never in my life ( once, twice la) I got 5 wrong. ahahahaha :DD I told ya, this is what I called as MIRACLE~ hahahahaha :DDDD

So, yeah :) The only paper I haven't get is my Intensive English. I heard that the lecture will give out the paper tomorrow. IF i'm not mistaken. But I hope she will do. hahahaha :D But seriously, I'm not really excited to know my mark. hahahaha not as excited as I was, when I was still called as High Schooler. hahahahahaha :D I feel like, more ignorant nowadays. I don't know why. Maybe this is what people call as Growing Up =.=. hahahaha :D
Nevermind, I can't stop myself from growing anyway. I'll just need to make sure that my childish attitude still with me no matter what. hahaha (dude, out of topic) hahahahaha XD

And YEAH~ as I was googling Josh Hutcherson picture, I saw this! OMO OMO OMO OMO OMO OMO OMONAAAA <3 Logan Lerman and Josh Hutcherson picture together when they both were SOOOO young! OMG! hahahahahahahahahaha :D
But still, I'm not so sure if the picture is real or not as Josh's picture is kind of ya know, like hanging, I mean like, um...cropped and then pasted next to Logan. hahahahahahahaXD
Oh well, Let just think it's real. HAHAHAHAHAHA

And that is their latest picture together ( ignore the guy with longhair. dun have idea who he was. hahahahahaXD sorry dude) this is seriously not edited la. and hahaha Logan is taller than Josh. hahahaha :DD and I just knew that they both were born on 1992, yep :) Fascinating facts aye? for me la, it's really fascinating me. hahahaha :D Oh damn it, why they both must be that cute?
Seriously I really would love to date anyone of them (Logan Lerman specifically HAHAHAHAHA) Who wouldn't anyway? ekeke
 but if rethink back, Would they date me? hahahaha
HELL NO. XDDD sad, but true..
I know who I am tho. hahahaha they are celebrity ma, they won't date normal people like me. Of course they would want to date a hottie and a cutie ma~ hahahahahaha :D
So, keep dreaming and love them until they find the lucky girl :)

<---- NIall Horan. He's my gang. hahahaha the 94's kids. ekekeke :) EEEYEPP :) Nomu yeppo. hahahahaha :)

Oh ya, just striking my skull just now. hahaha :D My stories... It's been a while I didn't update them though. I just feel, down lately. I don'tt know why. My emo-ish mode is coming back and haunting me down. and I'm feeling real depressed. No kidding...Maybe because of the same bitch, i was dealing with. yeah, I'm still be friend with her. Not really lah, she's the one who always look for me, telling me this, telling me that like I give a fuck to every words she's saying. Gosh, I feel like wanna kick her ass. hahaha :) But I'm not that bad, I'm still here, standing idiotically next to her. Damn it, I feel stupid =.=; I just don't understand creature like her. Why must she tell everything to me, I'm not even a family member or a diary. if she wanted to show off, go show off with other people who cares lah, not ME. Or if she just want the world to know, just make a blog lah, like this. She just wrote everything la inside there. Nobody will care or give a fuck or judge her if she wrote blog. Uh, even thinking about what she done and said, already make me pissed =.=; Hm..... Whateverlah...

Actually, that wasn't what I want to say. hahahaha :) I was about to tell how my stories is progressing. hahahaha :) and yeah... until today, I haven't found back my enthusiasms in continuing my stories. this early morning, yeah I get some of it but then as my parent told me to drive them off to town, it all gone. Now, I'm dull. And yeah, honestly I said here, one of the reason I don't continue writing LLA and SCM is that, I feel like ya know... nobody cares about it. I'm the only person who like it which doesn't count la. hahahaha :D Ya know, I wrote it for sis Jaba... but I feel like my story bore her. hahahahahahahahaha :D
Well, of course she said she liked it lah... but yeah....... I don't know lah. Maybe I'm just being pessimist here. ahahahahahahahaha :DDDD I'm becoming that a lot nowadays.

It's really hard for me to stay positive like before. I don't know. maybe I need something new... like, I don't know... Something new, that can excite me, that can make me feel lively, make me feel that I'm worth of living. hahahahaha XD

Because I keep feeling gloom and I just want to avoid everybody. I feel like I annoyed people and everybody hates me silently. They want me dead and I don't know, some of them maybe saying I'm a fat-ass, should just die... or something like 'perasan cute' just go to hell with that ugliness. *shrugged* I don't know.... I keep thinking bad stuff. ahahaha even in dreamland, I keep on having nightmares, seems like everything is against me. Maybe I should consider the killing-myself-offer. hahahahaha :D
Nah, I'm not brave enough to commit suicide. ekekeke

Hmmmmmm.... I just could sighed. Some of the day, I wish to drive all day, not going home early... hangout at the malls, the bookstores, reading books, watching the sunsets, walking at the park.... I just don't want to be home. I don't know why, but I just don't. I don't want to see people or people come and see me. I just wished to be apart from outside world. But I don't know what should I do....

Before this, I have imagination and I have my own world to discover. Now, I lost it. Even my imagination is against me. I can't make up a good imagination or a good story line. Everything just dull.... What's the point of having lots of gadget if it just keep making me sad?

I feel so sad, so depressed, so....angry.... without reason. Seriously... maybe I'm just disappointed of myself or maybe I'm just being Emo. hahahahahaha :DD
I wish to tell someone about this stupid feeling of mine, but I don't know who. I just find that, in this few days, It just hard for me to trust anyone with my feelings. Maybe I haven't forgive myself yet or maybe this is some mentally punishment for me. hahahahahaha XDD
Oh well..... let just hope this stupid feeling will go off soon. I just hate this feeling. The feeling of being useless and a loser. I miss the old me, the cheerful me, the happy-go-lucky me, the positive me, the best of me.......... I just miss 'me'.

So, yeah... that was freaking random alright. hahahahaha :D SO, that's all I want to type here. hahahaha :D I don't want to get too deeply emo-ing. hahahahahaha :D end up later, I'm going to slit my wrist. hahahahahahaha :D me don't want that. hahaha :D
So here we are. The end of my post. Here's my latest picture to end this very post :)
Adieu :3

P.S Let Your Smile Cover Up Your Tears :)