久しぶり!(^_^)v

Hisashiburi! It's been ages I didn't update this blog of mine. Not that I was busy or anything. (Well, I am quite busy this year, since I've starting my Degrees.) and then my social life is pretty good nowadays, that I kinda found a great friend to be with who support me and even force me to study hahaha Yeah, people like me need a friend like that. Anyway, there's lots of ups and down has been happening but I'm coping with it pretty nicely and that's because I have a very supportive families, especially sis Jaba and sis lalan, though they're not often available but I know deep deep in my heart that they're always there for me. hahaha Well, though there are times that they did something that I don't like. I mean, I'm sure I also did something that get into their nerves right? I mean, we're humans, we tend to make mistakes. hahahaha xD

I don't know if I ever mentioned this but somewhere around this year, my dad was admitted into hospital for having internal bleeding in his intestine and it was the most depressing moment of my life. I was seriously lost and I really don't know what to do or what to expect. I mean, I don't even finish my study yet and I hella jobless. Adding to that, my brother is still being as stupid as he could be (it was the only thing he could do tbh) so i was definitely at my most depressing moment ever. But still, I still act tough in front of my others family members. I laughed and joked with them, I don't know if they realize about it but yeah, if they don't, they might think that I'm heartless hahaha but then, not that they know that I was seriously miserable at that time. I broke down every time I went to shower because that's the only time I could be with myself. I was really-really scared that something bad would happen to my dad. I even wish that it was me who were there on the hospital bed. I mean, my mom needs him more though. Not saying that I don't matter or anything but if comparing me and dad, I'm sure mom need dad more. hahaha xD But then, well. Things get better and I'm still trying to fix things between me and my dad. He's still is annoying as ever but what to do? It's his nature for talking a lot hahaha he even strike a conversation with strangers. *sighs*

I am seriously trying to fix things between us though but I know and I admit, I'm not trying hard enough hahaha yeah, I definitely have the biggest ego ever and I don't like it. I know that both my parent are trying their best to make me happy and to make my future easier. They even bought me a house. CASH. can you believe it? I didn't even ask for it but they bought it because they thought like, while they still have the money, they want to make sure that I'll have my own house because no one could predict what's the future hold for us. Even my current car, they bought it on cash. *sighs* They did too much for adoptive child like me. So, if they ever worried that I'm going to leave them after I knew the truth, they shouldn't be. Because I owe them too much. I don't think I could ever pay all my debts for them, even if I had to work for my whole life. They did too much for me and too little for themselves. I am grateful but at the same time, guilty.


I don't know if they're aware that I took this picture hahahaha xD but seriously I gotta say, I wouldn't really be here anymore if it wasn't because of them. They meant too much to me, no matter what other people might ever said. I mean, like sis lalan. She may done a lot of shit, or even always put me second in most thing but then, I couldn't help it but to love her as much. I know, it sounds cheesy but I care about her more than anything. I just couldn't bring myself to hate her. Probably because of that huge fight we had once in the past hahaha and as for sis Jaba. I don't have to say anything else. I'm just gonna put it this way; if I'm gonna lose her one day, I don't know if I'm gonna be strong enough to stay strong or even breathing hahaha xD It's us against the world. We've been through a lot and I just can't imagine myself without her in my life hahaha sound cliche but yeah.

They may not close with one another but they both held that important place in my heart. yeerrr hahhahahaha

Anyway, enough being cheesy. hahahaha school... School is fine and most part it's fun too. My grades are getting higher each time and I'm proud of myself hahahaha *pats own back* I mean, last midterm I got 90% and the highest mark for my CCM subjects I'm like wow! is this real life? hahahaha xD only that I'm just a bit of stressed out because of my Thesis subjects. I'm worried  about it. I wonder if I can execute it without any problem. I mean, I do love my thesis topic since it's relevant to my lifetime goals of opening my own cafe in the future but then again, it's hard to do it because Dr Hii keep on pushing us and you know me, I don't like being pushed. I hate being force to do something. Even if it something I love doing, but if I'm forced to some level, I'll definitely not gonna do it. Like no shit hahaha xD I'm a rebellious person pfft. *rebellious la sangat* But yeah, I'm aware that I really need tot do it though I don't wanna do it. I was thinking that maybe I'll try to do it during my two months holiday.
Like spreading the questionanaires during that time since we're gonna have to present our thesis topic next year on April. Seriously, I feel fucked up so much hahahaha and at the same time, I'm pissed at the way Dr Hii trying to manage the class. Like, it was very obvious he never open our thesis that we've been sent to him for hundreds of time. I hate that to be honest because he's been forcing us to finish it all at one point but then, he ended up not checking them at all. Like where's the point for us to finish it if he doesn't even care to have a glimpse on whatever shit we do? eugh. I know that he's the principal and he's a busy man. But a job is a job. And obviously,i it's his responsibility to check the thing we did. I mean, it takes both side to work well. If he only expect us to do our best, then he better show us that he also do the same. Like seriously (=.=)

Hm... what else should we talk about. Oh right. This upcoming sunday, I'll be going to Brunei again with my friends. Chinese people really like to go for a trip like no shit hahahaha it's gonna be my second time going on a trip with them though but I don't really mind going because they're fun to be with. Way fun than spending time with my normally bumiputera's friends and I learn few chinese words from spending time with them as well hahaha xD Um... Maybe we'll take pictures and I'm gonna update it here if I wasn't lazy. hahahaha xD and I'm thinking to buy more earl grey because hella, last time I bought earl grey from Brunei and it was the best tea i ever taste hahahaha xD I'm in love with Earl Grey. Though currently I'm fond with Green Tea as well as the English Breakfast tea.

I'm being British, now hahahaha xD Ah, suddenly it just hit me. I really wish I had my console right now. It's been ages I didn't play game and I even left The Evil Within half way through, same goes to TLOU, since I was replaying it again because my stupid brother deleted all my saved data, including my Sims baby. u.u but it doesn't matter, I can always play again hahaha and I wish I'll get a new console for Christmas. I don't mind for having another PS3, because my myy, there's still bunch of PS3 games I haven't play yet. When I able to have all of them, then maybe I'll be saving money so that I can afford PS4 ahahaha xD And oh, speaking of money. I was thinking that maybe after I'm graduating, I'll be working for a while like maybe for two or three years, collect money first. Then I'll stop for a while to get cooking certificates and maybe even learning pastries, just to get the certificates of course. And then, maybe then I'll decided to open cafe. Yeah. I'm thinking that, since now I'm only 22. So, in about 4 to 5 years time, I'll be having my own cafe. Yay! I'm looking forward for that hehehe :)

It won't be easy but since it's like my biggest life goals, I shall make it happen! xD

I think that's all I wanna say for now. hehehehe OH before that, currently I'm writing three stories hahahahaha and which I'm thinking of finishing during my upcoming holiday as well. Awyea! well, I might update with a special post about one of my story which is currently my favourite for the time being. I'll post about the characters that I came up with and what are their traits like hehehe xD Well, then. I shall stop now and I'll be seeing you soon!


P.S: New motto:: Things always getsbetter if you wait for awhile longer. So, keep on smiling! (^_^)v