The Depression Test

Found this test in Jaba's blog, so I decided to try it out. Guess what? 
Through this test, now I'm confirmed that I have bipolar Disorder (=.=;) Cyclothymia ( mild bipolar disorder) is High as well. Oh God, Why? hahahaha :D

DisorderYour Score
Major Depression:High
Bipolar Disorder:Extremely High
Cyclothymia:Very High
Seasonal Affective Disorder:High
Postpartum Depression:N/A
Take the Depression Test

Endless Blessing Makes Me Who I Am Today :)

Greetings, humans :)
Yeah, I was actually really sick, i mean REALLY REALLY SICK this evening. I can barely move myself. Even to the toilet, I feel so sick. I never ever felt that sick before. So, I told sis Jaba that I can't online chat tonight as I was sleeping since 6.30p.m until 8.30p.m actually. Then, as I woke up, I felt my head were very damn heavy. I barely can lift it up, yeah. Seriously, I don't even touch my Lappy since morning because of my sicknesses ( Fever to be exact ) I'm in serious fever if I say I can't online, you know. As it pretty obvious that online-ing is now kind of part of me. hahaha :) One day without online, my life is empty. ekekeke :) It's a metaphor, no worries for my life is pretty colorful :) Even reading message my sis Jon sent me just now pun I can barely read. I know, it's pretty bad! Anyway, I manage to overcome my terrible dizziness, endless back-pain,  and my flu after I read one phrases of Word of God which is:
" Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed, save me, and I shall be saved, for thou art my praise." -Jeremiah 17:14- And Immediately I feel okay. Yeah, pretty awesome heh? I know God is with me and he healed me like immediately. Now, I'm pretty sure that I'm love and loved by Him :) And I'm quite thankful for the medicine my sis Jon brought for mum last time. I'm feeling pretty good right now, but too bad, sis Jaba offline already. hahaha :)  Oh well, tomorrow never die, as she always said to me :) So, yeah. Now, I'm officially graduated from my high school! Weehoo~ I want to go party now EHH, scratch that. It's now the time for I think of my future. I'm pretty much depress when I'm thinking about it. You know how my mum is. hehehei, she said Arts and Design is works for losers who has no future. DaFUQ she said that way? Seriously, I want to study the damn thing pretty badly. I'm always wanted to learn Art and Design since I was so young. I'm drawn into drawing since I was 5, but I can't figure out why she doesn't approve me to learn Arts and Design? I am dedicated to learn it and I'm pretty sure I can success in that course. But, yeah... We must listen to everything that our parents says, aye? I have not much choice now. Whether to go Riam Institute or Curtin University. Maybe I'll take my Cambridge Level A in Riam as Curtin only offer foundation in the first month of the year. Neways, I'm thinking of fulfilling my parent wish first and make them proud. Then, when they have full trust in me, I'll go on my own way :) I'm still young. RELAX~ hahahahaha :))

So, today morning I go crazy and cut my front hair which now I'm pretty much regretting it. hahaha :) It's ugly! (>____<) But positively way of thinking, it's not gonna stay short forever. hahahaha :) Once it long again, I'll cut it like the way it was before. And good news for you guys too, I'm not gonna take picture of myself as long as I hate it. hahahahahahaha :) Yeah, I never hate my haircut before but this time, I'm so regretting it. If I had Doraemon's time machine, I would tell myself not to cut it. hahahaha :) Never mind, it's too late to regret it now. Just learn to deal with it. hehei. And yeah, yesterday I got my SPM result. Well, nothing to be proud of actually as I'm not really getting that All A's result. hahaha :) But I'm still grateful to get it though because seriously, it is far beyond what I've expected to get. hahahaha :) Seriously, I was like Oh my God! is this real?! hahahaha :) especially my Modern Mathematic. For my entire life being call as High School student, I never ever ever get my Modern Mathematic B. hahahahaha :D I always fail it. don't believe me? Ask Mr. SharolNizam, my math teacher. hahahaha :D He knows. hahahahaha :D So, it is beyond my expectation. I never thought I could get all pass you know. I always thought that I would failed all my Science and Maths subject. But Praise the Lord, with his endless blessing on me, I get more than I have expected and I regret nothing. Besides, SPM is just the starter you know. I still have more stuff to achieve. Like graduated from University then go to work :) Well, I successfully passed my level 4 in Education's life. Now, I'm thinking of continue on level 5, Pre-U life. YEZZA! Can't wait to start, but feeling to nervous when thinking of it. hahahaha :) Anyway, I want to congratulating myself though. hahaha :D as no one in my house congratulating me since yesterday, except for sis Jonny :) and sis Jaba and sis Inut and Phoebe also. That's all. hahahaha :) So, including me, there would be 5 now. Yeah, no one care about me in this house lately. My mum and dad, do. They really do and they was thinking of buying me a car for present. But Seriously, I don't want a car. I was PSP! or at least they bought me iPod Classic. But still, mum insist to buy me car. Oh well, maybe I just deal with it with a broken-hearted. I know, I should be grateful for getting a car. But car is seriously not my things. hahaha :) I never dreamt of having any car before. besides, mum's car  is already enough for me though. And besides, car is too expensive maa! hahaha :D

But as my parent insisted to get me car, then I shall tell them my dream car. hehehei :) Yezza, I'm adoring white Vios since whenever. hahahaha :) Actually, I'm craving to have Honda Civic but it will cost like hundred thousands or something like that. That's why I think I'm gonna have Vios lah. Beside, it is cheaper than Honda Civic. If not Vios, then I'll go for the new Honda City. But thinking back, mum already have Honda City, so I'll stick with Vios. hahahaha :) And speaking of having a car, I feel like celebrating Super Sweet 16. hahahaha :) Oh well, just telling though. Ngehehehehehe :) No, I haven't tell my mum which car I want them to get for me as I'm quite busy begging PSP from her. hahahahaha :) Yeah, I ask her like everyday and then I also asked her to buy me electronic dictionary. Hahahahaha :D She should actually be thankful for I didn't ask for something expensive. I never ask anything that is more than RM1000. Even my DSLR, I just ask for the most cheap. hahahahaha :) Its the same anyway. Well, my only stuff that worth more than thousand is my N9 and I guess that is the last thing I ask which is worth than that. ahahahaha :D Me no like expensive stuff :) Besides, expensive stuff nowadays never last long *shrugged*

And besides PSP, iPod is the most things I really want. So, instead of buying me a car, they could just buy me 100 iPod with it. *shook head* Never mind. I know, one day I can have this. ehehehe :) Nothing to rush though because right now, I still can listen to music in my Lappy :) Well, having iPod is somewhat my youngster self dream. I always dream to have an iPod and listening to it when strolling along the beaches, like in the movie you know? hahahahahahahaha :D Most likely, a music lover like me, this stuff is quite the most precious stuff in the world. But, if my parent doesn't want to get me and iPod, it doesn't really matter anyway. I can asked them to buy me MP3 instead :) cheaper and even classic~ :) And speaking of classic, yeah I want iPod Classic instead of iPod touch. Why? Because I just freaking hate touch screen. Always typos. hahahaha :) every time I updating my twitter status through phone, there will definitely typo somewhere. I just freaking hate it. But that was before la. Now, I'm getting use to it and me and typo get along very well. hahahaha :DD

<------ my right eyes is swollen. very wrong timing to take picture. hahahaha :) But I can't stop myself to take picture because I want to show off my SuperMario hoodie. Muahahahahaha :D Yeah, I got my first hoodie at Merdeka Mall yesterday :) Speaking of yesterday, I drove my best friend, Prudence and Valerie to Merdeka Mall and the three of us kind of celebration our no-so-flying-color-SPM results. hahahahaha :) And we go watching John Carter together. ekekekeke :D I tell you, it was my very first time driving to Merdeka Mall. Thank God for protecting the three of us for the whole long journey there. And in April, we've been thinking to go out again. Going to PC fair and maybe will go somewhere else after that. But, not confirm yet as Prudence is having her first exams this April. Wishing her the best though :) And yeah, Prudence got iPhone 4s from her parent and I would want to congratulate her for finally getting her dream phone though :) Valerie and I, well we don't exactly ask for anything. hahahaha :D like Val said, we kind of getting our present like randomly from our parent. hahahaha :D Oh well, we both are the youngest member in the family, no kidding. She always get what she wants. hahaha and me, I   also do get what I want but not always and mostly I have to wait for like 2 or 3 months. But worth to wait though :)))) And yeah, I bought myself the SuperMario Hoodie as my present to myself for congratulationing myself. HAHAHAHAHA :) I always buy stuff for myself whenever I achieved something :) That's how I burn my spirit to stay on the right tracks :)

Reporting the time, it is 1.30a.m and I haven't feeling asleep yet. hahahaha :) Later morning, I'm gonna fetch my shawny with sis Jon and went register myself, taking computer course before I starts my study again. hehehei :) Still lots to do (=.=') I guess, my fun time is over now. I need to focus on my life starting.... Ummm.... Maybe few months? HAHAHAHAHAHA XD and right now, I'm listening to Escape The Fate - Zombie Dance. Like seriously, I'm freaking addicted to Escape the Fate. I love like more than one songs and currently, I'm in love with their song entitled Issues. hehehei :D I love the drum beat and the guitar. Oh my, such a beautiful music. hahahaha :D and BMTH, I only like Don't Go and Sleep With One Eyes Open. Falling in Reverse as well. I really freaking love FIR! maybe because FIR and ETF vocalist is the same person. hahaha :)) But of course Danger Radio is on the top of my favorite list :) I can't deny it, I'm in love with Andrew de Torres cute voice. hahahaha :) Just too cute to be listen to. And every time I drove my mum somewhere, I always lost in my own thought because of his voice. Yeah, I freaking love it and I don't care if mum got annoyed by my voice as I'm singing along with him and pretty much syok sendiri. hahaha :D and last time, as I waited for mum in the car kan, I hate banging inside the car and singing out loud, then I look to my left and saw this other driver, he was like o.O. hahahahaha :D maybe think I'm crazy. ekekeke XD Oh well, my car my rules. hahahahaha XD I drive, I choose the music :D

Like few days ago, I was followed by two bandmates of newest rock band namely as Overworld. the drummer and the vocalist of the band followed me and I was like "O.o WHY?" hahahahahaha :D but yeah, I'm feeling real good though for having an artist to follow me in twitter. Besides, the vocalist is pretty cute. hahahahaha :D then kan, as I scrolling down in his twitter account I saw that he posting video of music that he made himself lah. So, as the music is pretty good to hear, I was thought to post and share it with my followers as well and few days later, I saw he reply me back with thanks A LOT! I WAS LIKE "O.O" ahahahahahhaaha :D FREAKING LOVING IT! GOD, thank you! hahahahahaha :D I never got replied by any artist before and he was my first. So, as soon as they came out with their first album in the future, I'm gonna download all their songs and became their fans! hahahahahaha :))) Even it is just a simple thank, I feel appreciated though :)

<---- Random picture. the first picture I saw when I open folders. hahahahaha  :D Few days ago, I'm pretty busy looking for picture for the cast of my story. ehehehe and I found this picture of Kellin Quinn. It's my favorite so far. Hahahahahaha :D But nah, not really into him though as I'm not really a fans of Sleeping With Sirens. I only know their one song name "do it now, remember it later," or pretty much something like that. Hahahahaha :D And yeah, I found his formspring last time and I saw this one person asked like "Are you a girl? you sound like one," or something like that. and he answered like "I'm pretty sure I'm a dude," hahahahahahahaha :D Yeah, seriously, for me. His voice isn't sound girly at all even a little. For me, it is much more like listening to little boy that haven't reach their puberty yet. But of course, he did. Maybe it is his specialties. Deal with it people. hahahaha :D Thank God, they didn't say Andrew's voice sounds girly, if not I would pleasurably declared a world war. hahahahahahaha :D Just Kidding, I will do nothing but criticize them silently. ekekekeke :D I pretty much awesome in doing so. So, yeah :) hahahaha :D Peace yo! ekekeke XD

Lastly, I want to introduce my newest husband. HAHAHAHA :) Meet, Ryan Seaman, drummer of FIR. YEZZA! He already have a girlfriend though but what the hell, he's cute. hahahaha :) But not really like him as much as I like my other husband which I can't really recall their names. HAHAHAHA :) and yeah, obviously he likes cats. In contrary, I love dogs. Hahahaha :D If we gonna have a relationship, we definitely will fight like cat and dog. hahahahaha :) Oh well, never mind. hahahaha :) Speaking of pets, I think most people in the world adore Cats than dogs. as in tumblr, I often saw cats post in my dashboard and solemnly about dogs. Yeah, and now I'm drawn into cats. Hahahahahahaha :) cat is cute though. I can't resist their cuteness but still, I'm loyal to dogs :) No worries, I'm forever dogs lover :D And honestly, I'm running out of topic right now. hahahahaha :) So, Um... Yeah, gonna ends it here. hehehehehehei :)) And to officially ending this post of mine, I let you enjoy my currently favorite bands picture :) So, Enjoy :D

1. Introducing my precious Danger Radio :)) 

2.Escape the Fate

3. Falling in Reverse

4. Bring Me The Horizon

So, yeah.... I'm freaking love screamo and rocks music nowadays. hahahaha :) Its somewhat a medicine for me though. Its help a lot through my depress time and when I felt lonely. hehehehei :) thanks guys :) Rock Music Industries, Keep Moving On!!

P.S Let Your Smile Cover Up Your Tears :)