When My Heart Speak

I don’t understand what you really want
Do you really want to be with me?
Or you just pretend that you really want me to?
I can’t figure out why you doing this to me
I feel like an idiot who thrown themselves into the pit of fire
Where no one care no matter how hard you screaming out
There’s no way out
I love you so much that’s make me so blind
I’m lost in this game for I can’t lose you.
I’m so sick of your ignorant self
Fuck you for drowning me in this ocean of lie
Where all your promises meant nothing but a full lie
I’m now forever stuck,
I can’t find my way out
I screaming out loud
Hoping someone out there to come and save me

You told me that you care when you’re not
You told me that you’ll be there but you never did
I call you for hundred times a day, all you did is ignore
I wish you to call me for once but you never did
What do you think I am for?
I’m not your diary or your toys to play with
I have my own life to take care of instead of listening to your fucking words
Just leave me alone!
I’m sick and freaking tired of you!
Go to fucking hell!
If I knew you would never be the same,
I rather survive this world alone in my own way
My life is suck enough, dear
I don’t need anyone else to make it worst

Please God!
Pull me to the surface of truth
I’m weak, and I can’t afford this entire lie anymore
I can’t live with this kind of people anymore
They just hugging me when they need me
And throw me to the side like a teddy bear.
I know now why people committing suicide
Slitting their wrist to ease the pain of their broken hearted
Because dying is the fastest way to get the hell out of here
Please, my Father,
Save my soul from all this misery
Before I have the guts kill myself in vain
I can take any more violence
My innocence is already scarred
And now I’m a rebel for the rest of my life

Just save me, my Lord
This is all I wanted.